My own lesson in remembering I am enough

Have you ever felt that a small comment can tarnish a great experience, if you “let it in”?

Someone’s brief words or a brief look can “rattle around” in your head and in your memories for hours, days or weeks on end.

Am I right?

Well, I felt a bit like that recently after an incredible Saturday night dancing the foxtrot in aid of “Strictly Nightingales” at the fabulous Carden Park Hotel in Cheshire, in front of a live audience of hundreds!

As I stepped out onto the dance floor I felt exhilarated and alive and ready to soak up every moment of the exciting (and terrifying!) experience.

And then afterwards came the judges’ comments… and I wasn’t prepared.

I’d been concentrating on doing my best and remembering the steps and trying to stop my legs from wobbling with nerves.

As I finished my dance I was proud to have got through it. I had only had seven hours of lessons due to my family and work commitments, and the last lesson had been two whole weeks before the event.

I don’t remember exactly what the judges said, but I do remember the “gut punching ‘criticism’ “ of being given a 6 followed quickly with the relief and gratitude of a 10!!

When I entered this event it was never about winning, or what points I was given. It was about realising my childhood dream of dancing whilst at the same time raising money for a good cause. So here’s the thing.

Why did I care about getting a 6? Why did my mind “rattle” most of the next day with thoughts such as:

“Why was he so mean to give me a 6 when the other judge gave me a 10?!”

“How can they say I did the hardest ballroom dance and then not take that into account?”

“Should I blame myself for not fitting in more lessons around my husband being away with the Army, looking after two children and working full-time?”

And so it could have gone on.

Have you ever felt like that? A bit bruised and defensive and full of what you “should” have said or done?

The good news is, it didn’t last!

I recognised what I was doing.

I was letting my “ego” get involved when actually it had never been about that.

I was “letting in” something that was totally irrelevant to the whole experience.

I LOVED being on that dance floor because I’ve loved dance since I was 4 years old when I first started ballet.

I am SO GRATEFUL to everyone who helped me to raise over £2,200 for the incredible cause of Nightingale House Hospice.

I got to learn and dance my first ever ballroom dance with a professional partner - just like on Strictly which I’ve loved since it first started.

So this experience has taught me many things, but the main thing it has REMINDED me about is this:

When you “show up as you are” and do something because it matters, or because you love it, or because you ‘feel the fear but doing it anyway’ then let that be enough.

Because it is enough.

And if you feel anyone “judges you harshly” then let them, that’s okay, you don’t have to “let it in”.

Be proud of who you are and what you do, and if you need someone “in your corner” during hard times, you know where I am.

I’m here to help you with your confidence and to “keep dancing” along the journey of life!!!

Cat xx